Full Disarray

Hey Friends,

Now that God has opened my eyes regarding my own kingdom building I am asking Him to show me how He wants me to live out the 7 experiment in my own life. It may be the way Jen Hatmaker did it, it may not. I want to leave the door open to what God has for me and what He wants to teach me.

Man, the kingdom I have tried to build. It’s kind of disgusting. In many ways Hobby Lobby has contributed to my idolatry. I also have worshipped often at Ann Taylor Loft.

Currently my apartment is in full disarray. There are clothes, wall art, and other things in piles all over my apartment. I’m looking for some boxes to put them all in.  A huge part of the problem is that I am very sentimental. I have always had a hard time getting rid of things because someone gave it to me, or I bought it for such and such occasion. Purging is a process for me. Every day I walk into my closet looking for something else to move to the end of the rack for the garage sale. The biggest offender? T-shirts. I serve in the student ministry at my church. I have SO MANY t-shirts. And it’s hard because I feel attached to them. Guys, I have so many t-shirts they don’t even fit in one drawer. It’s embarrassing.

Here are the things that are in the works:

• Purging my house of idols that I have used to build my own kingdom
• Organizing said idols into a garage sale
• Praying through how to use any money I earn
• Praying through what this process of 7 will look like in my life.
• Encouraging my hubby to join me in the process. God is doing so much in my heart, I don’t want to guilt anyone into joining me. I want it to be work that God is doing in their lives too!

In the midst of it all. I am trying to slow down and allow God to infect my heart and change it. I’m trying to seek Him instead of stuff. Here is what I am realizing; even in those desires and actions I am trying to make the change happen and well, I don’t have it in me. I am not strong enough to stand firm against the ways of the World. I need Jesus to take over, give me strength, renew my mind and heart. I cannot do it on my own. And that my friends is the point. God is asking me to seek Him, to trust Him, and to surrender all of me at His feet where He can take the mess of me and my kingdom and create something bigger and better than anything I could dream or imagine. My house and my heart is in full disarray and I am sure that is exactly where God wants me.