Letter to Myself

A year ago, God called my husband to take a college ministry position. Over the last year I have watched as God has stretched both me and my husband in big ways, grown us like never before, and given us people to lead that we love beyond expression.  If I could only tell myself a year ago all that God would do, I know that I would not believe it. Today I want to share wisdom with myself a year later.

Ashlee,

You are about to embark on a journey like never before. God is about to rock your world. Your comfortable little bubble is about to expand. Be prepared because God is going to stretch you like you cannot even imagine. Don’t be afraid, God is going to bless you beyond what you could hope.

Not Just for Your Husband

You don’t know it yet, but God is going to call you specifically to this ministry. He is going to pull and tug and get in your face until you finally walk in obedience. Ashlee, this will mean walking away from youth ministry, but do not fear. God is going to give you a great love for college students.

 House Full of Girls

This may seem weird to you, because right now, all you see is a house full of boys. Mostly boys playing Halo. Mostly smelly, hungry boys playing Halo. I know you are content to hide in your bedroom and watch TV. But that is all about to change. It’s time to get up and leave your comfort zone behind and open your door and your heart to a precious group of girls.  These girls, they need a leader and God is going to call you to do it. These girls will stretch you, and ask you some of the toughest questions. They will make you dive deep into scripture and process again why you believe what you believe. They will bless you, love you, and serve you in ways you cannot imagine right now. Ashlee, God is about to bless you with an amazing group of girls.

Busy Life

Yes things are about to get crazy Ashlee. Crazier than you want most days. God is going to show you an idol in your life called “alone time”. You have bowed down to this idol too many times and God is going to rip it out of your hands, so you can struggle with what true rest looks like. You will be busy EVERY DAY, but don’t be afraid. God is going to show up and you will see that all that busy matters in Eternity.

Make Time for Rest

You have mistaken alone time for rest. Ashlee, find rest in Jesus, not in alone time. You see you take your alone time and fill it with busy things and in the end you really don’t rest.  Ashlee, you really don’t have a clue what it means to rest. God is going to show you how. You will struggle with it. In fact, there will be many hard conversation and tears over your need for rest. God will prevail and He will give rest to your weariness.

 Equipped Disciple Maker

God has knit in your heart a deep desire to see the next generation discipled. I know you have struggled and your heart aches for people who care for the Word of God. You have no idea, but those late night talks with your Lovie are about to come full circle. God is about to ask you to disciple an entire group full of young women. God is going to show you that discipleship is not an act, but a lifestyle. God is going to show you that discipleship is more than just teaching the Word, but walking through life with so many different people. It will mean giving up some of your sleep for late night talks. It will mean holding so many different women that are hurting and struggling. It will mean gently getting in the face of some and exposing sin in their lives. It will be hard, it will require more than you think you have, but God will be faithful. Ashlee, walk in the heart of discipleship God has given you.

Teacher

I know you are hungry to use your gift of teaching. You have no idea how God is about to use you. God is going to call you to host a Bible study in your home. If you knew that it might scare you right now. It will scare you even when God calls you to it. But Ashlee, God has prepared you. God has given you all the skills and tools you will need. And He is going to blow your mind, because this Bible study is going to outgrow your little one bedroom apartment living room. And yet again God will provide. Ashlee, you have no idea how many teaching moments God is going to give you over the next year, so study up, buckle your seat belt and enjoy the ride!

Change

That man you love, God is going to grow him and change him. God is going to answer so many prayers you have prayed for him. He will be given wisdom from the Lord that you just do not understand. And wait until you hear him teach when he leads at camp this summer. Girl, it is going to BLOW YOUR MIND. You will stand in awe and praise God for all that He is going to do. So wait, watch, and be in awe.

Ministry Hurts and is Hard

Your character and that of your husband will be questioned. Partners in ministry will move on. People will walk away from Jesus. I know you consider yourself to be without grace and mercy. But just wait. God is going to stir your heart toward compassion, loving kindness, and mercy.  You will experience heart break and pain. You will grieve for others. You will feel like your heart is being ripped out of you, but Ashlee, God will not forget you. He has you in His hand. God will show you how you hold too tight to things and people.  Be strong and courageous. Be prepared and stand firm in the gospel, hard times will come!

There is Victory
In the midst of all the pain, victory will come. People will confess their sin. Girls will walk in community together. They will trust another girl for the first time. They will love each other like sisters. People will hunger and thirst for Righteousness.  Ashlee, yes there will be pain and it will be great, but there will be the sweetness of the Victory of Jesus permeating their lives and transforming them from the inside out. It will be a beautiful thing to watch, so don't miss the moments.

A year ago God gave my husband and I a great gift by calling us into college ministry. It has been hard, it had been messy, it has been beautiful, because it has been the Gospel lived out in my life. 

Photo Credit: All the photographs in this post were taken by Laura Nicole Photography. She is a  gifted photographer in the Dallas/ Ft. Worth area who also loves Jesus. You should hire her. This is not a sponsored post, just my personal opinion!

It's Vital: How I Study the Bible

Sitting down on my bed, I pick up my Bible. I open it up and begin to search the Scriptures. I have questions and I need answers.

For the past 15 years I have been studying the same way. As a teenager I went to a camp where I learned how to study the Word of God. The tools I learned I began putting into practice as a college student. In college I began teaching the Bible for the first time. Now as an adult I continue to use the tools I learned as a 9th grader as I teach others how to study the same way.

When I began working with students 11 years ago I quickly realized how little they knew about the Bible. It appalled me that no one seemed to be doing anything about it. During this time the Lord grew in me a passion to teach the next generation how to study the Bible.

We don't Know God
Knowing the Bible is vital to any believers growth. You cannot know love God without knowing Him. You cannot follow God without knowing Him. To not know God is very dangerous, we see what happens in Judges when a generation rises up that does not know God. Unfortunately I see many in the next generation that are doing what is right in their own eyes.

We Too Easily Trust Man
There is another problem I see arising. That is the problem of trusting man's words over the Bible. The Internet and YouTube have given us countless preachers and pastors we can listen to and learn from. The problem lies when we only listen to these pastors and preachers and do not study the Word for ourselves.

So how do we then learn how to study the Bible for ourselves? I would like to introduce you to the way I study. It's not something I made up, so I cannot take any credit for any of these tools!

The Inductive Study Method
The way I study is called the Inductive Study Method. I first learned this attending a summer camp at Precept Ministries International. The premise of the this way of studying is that you learn directly from the Bible, not from reading books or commentaries and not from listening to a pastor talk about it on YouTube.

The Inductive Study Method is comprised of three easy steps: Observation, Interpretation, & Application.

Observation
Observation is the first step I use when studying. Observation is simply focusing on what does the Bible say. There are several tools we use when observing. The first is called reading with a purpose. Reading with a purpose is simply reading through a passage of scripture with intention and focus. It means as  I read I am asking myself questions and looking for the answers. I ask things like who is writing, who are they writing to, why are the writing, etc.

The next thing I do is I mark key words. Key words are repeated words or phrases that unlock the meaning of the text. Some easy key words I always mark: author or main character, recipient (who the author is writing to), God, Jesus, Holy Spirit.

Next, I make lists. Almost all of my lists are focused on my key words. I write down everything that I learn about that word.

There are other steps that help me observe scripture. I look for contrasts & comparisons, I look for terms of conclusion (word like therefore), and I mark time & geography. Once I have done all of these I start looking for themes. I might be looking for the theme of the entire book, a chapter, or a paragraph. Sometimes the writer will tell me why the book the written, but other times I use what I have observed to determine the theme. Most often this is determined by the key words I marked & listed.

Interpretation
Interpretation is the next step I use when studying the Bible. Please note, proper interpretation can only happen when we properly observe scripture. Interpretation is focusing on what the Bible says. There are two phrases I want you to remember with interpretation: context is King & scripture best interprets scripture.

Context is King because it rules in interpretation. I develop context when I intentionally observe the text and take the entire book and it's theme into consideration as I study.

Scripture interprets scripture is something called a cross reference. A cross reference is when I look at another place in scripture that talks about the same idea or key word in the book I am studying.

Along with context and cross references, word studies are important when determining what the Bible means. Word studies are one of my favorite parts of Bible study. A word study is when I look up the Greek or Hebrew definition of a word. You see we don't realize it, but we often come to scripture with a modern day perspective or connotation of a word. Word studies help us understand what the words means instead of thinking we already know what it means. The easiest way to do a word study is with Blue Letter Bible. They have great tutorials that will show you how to do a word study!

Application
After I have learned what the Bible says and what it means, then I must turn inward and consider how it applies to me. Application happens when I allow what I learn in the Bible to change the way I believe  or how I live my life. Ultimately, application is the purpose of Bible study. I always want to finish my time studying with asking "What does this mean for me?" "How should this truth change the way I live my life?"

So there you have it. This is how I have been studying the Bible for the last 15 years. I pray that it encourages you to pick up your Bible and study it for yourself. I encourage you to check out what Precept is doing and pick up one of their Bible study books.

Gifted

What is wrong with me?? Why can’t I think like that? I walked away asking myself these questions and feeling very frustrated. I have these two friends, who baffle and slightly annoy me. Anytime I go to them with a project I am working on they attack me with questions. Their questions are so good.  The way their brains can think is what leaves me baffled and annoyed. I wonder, why DID I NOT THINK OF THAT!!! I often leave angry at myself thinking I am no good at all.

So I have been turning to God and asking Him some questions. What is wrong with me?? Why can’t my brain work like theirs? Softly and gently He is whispering a response. He is saying “Because I did not make you that way.” “I did not gift you with their gifts.” All of a sudden everything clicks: OH, well that makes sense God! 

Personality and Spiritual Gifts

Often I think we think that our personality and our gifting is the same. On any personality test I rate the same (oh they might be called different things) but my rating it quite clear.  I am a perfectionist. I think analytically. I like things neat, clean, and perfect.  I strive for the best. This often leads people to believe I have the spiritual gift of administration. They would be wrong though. God has given me two Spiritual gifts in particular: teaching and prophesy. While my personality shapes the way my Spiritual gifts look, my personality does not direct what gifts I am given. 

Who I Am in Okay!
It’s important for all of us to recognize both our personality and our spiritual gifting. We must recognize them and then decide we are okay with the way God made us. We must not put priority on personality or spiritual gifting. We must recognize that both of these shape us into the person that we are. Who I am is okay. It’s okay that I do not share the same personality or gifting of my friends. It’s okay because that is how God made me. I must accept that. Accepting myself means I do not try to be who I am not. It means I cannot allow myself to be frustrated when I am not what God did not intend for me to be. 

We Need Each Other
I also need to acknowledge that I need my friends. We each bring something different to the table. This is especially true when it comes to spiritual gifts. Paul talks about this in 1 Corinthians 12. He describes the gifts given to believers as a body with different parts. Within the body of Christ we need each other just like the hands and the feet or the nose and the mouth need each other. When we are missing a part of our body, everything is off.  Such is the body of Christ when we do not recognize and walk in our spiritual gifting. 

How do we do this? First we need to recognize our spiritual gifts! The Bible gives us four clear passages on spiritual gifts: 1 Corinthians 12, Romans 12, Ephesians 4, and 1 Peter 4. I encourage you to dive into these passages and learn about spiritual gifts. I would also encourage you as you read these passages to create a chart about what you learn. Ask these questions: Why are spiritual gifts given? Who gives the gifts? What are the gifts that are given? You will learn so much by doing this! Often the Lord will show you your gift as you study.

Next we need to find a place of service. This service should be within the body of Christ. So look around your church and seek out where God would have you to serve. Once God clearly shows you where, please dive in!

Finally we need to remember this service thing isn't about us. God tells us in His word that the purpose of Spiritual gifts for for the building up of the body of Christ, so the body would be complete. So please don't allow service to allow your head to get big. Ultimately you are serving God, not man. Continually check your heart and make sure you are serving for the right reasons.

Women's Retreat

My overnight bag thrown over one arm, my purse on another we walked to the front desk to check in. After we were checked in, we went for some dinner. We returned to the hotel our bellies stuffed with taco goodness. We walked to the ballroom and looked for a table big enough to hold all of us. Here we were a group of girls from my college ministry with me as their leader for the weekend. We were attending our first Women’s Retreat held by our church. As we searched around I saw an open table. Of course, the only table that had enough seats would be at the front of the room. The weekend was full of fun, worship, time to share, and truth spoken by Godly women.

Last weekend I learned some vital wisdom for ministry:

The Importance of Fun

“Ashlee, Lighten Up.” Is a phrase I have heard more often than I would like to admit to you.  Fun has never been my specialty, in fact I often have relied on my husband to be the fun one. I was excited as I watched my girls go from nervous to bold as they walked up to women they never knew all because someone handed them a game to play. Then there was a craft led by the women from Shanty 2 Chic. My girls were so proud to show off the craft they made. At the retreat there was a late night PJ party with more fun! I could tell they were a little nervous at first, but after the first silly video, they were rolling with laughter. I learned that not only is there a time and place for fun, but it is essential at times to bring a group of people together.

 The Importance of Inter-generational Relationships

I knew at several points in the weekend my girls were afraid of the older women around them. You see, my girls are not around other generations of women very often. As students they were sectioned off from the rest of the church. In college ministry, we are working to reconnect them to the larger body of the church. After the first session I pulled my girls together and asked them what God was showing them. Several of them mentioned that they were shocked to hear that some of the older women struggled with similar things as them. It showed them that getting older does not fix sin issues and struggles. They realized the need for them to deal with their sin struggled now. I realized how vital it is for my girls to connect with other women in the church. It amused me that they were afraid of the older women, many of whom are my friends. I also realized I must strive to connect them with other women in the church. I hope to do this through mentoring relationships and participation in other women’s ministry events.

The Importance of Being Still

One of the lessons we heard during the retreat was on the importance of being still. God has talked to me about this recently. To be quite frank, I am weary and worn. The last few weeks I have struggled with sickness. I am exhausted. I cannot even get things done because we have been so busy. God has spoken, and I need to be still before Him. I need to clear out some of the busy-ness in my life. I am not sure how this will happen, but it must. I cannot continue on like this for much longer. The most important thing in all of this, is being still is something God has called me to. It is not negotiable. I have started to walk in obedience by finding ten minutes every morning to be still. I pray, read scripture, and enjoy the quietness that occurs each morning before my home becomes busy (and I do not even have children yet!!). 

My girls and I had a great time at the Women’s Retreat, so much fun we did not want to leave. I am grateful for the precious women who served at the retreat, so I could attend. It was such a treat to just be at an event and not be in charge of anything! It was a blessing to have undivided time with my girls and for us to enjoy time together. We cannot wait until next year!!

Lessons Learned in Tragedy

Last week I shared what I was learning from the book of Job while walking through the tragedy that struck my community. You never know when tragedy will strike.

Today I would like to share with you some of the ministry lessons I learned in the midst of tragedy. Please head over to the Transform Student Blog to read what God showed me.

Lessons from Job

What do we do when tragedy hits home? How do we respond? Last week, three young men died in my community. You might have seen the story on the news. I awoke on Tuesday and strangely felt prompted to check my Instagram. Weird right?  As it opened my feed was full of people mourning the death of these three young men. My heart sunk and immediately felt burdened. I did not personally know these young men, but the students my husband and I minster to did. I started asking God what do I do? God, what do I say?

My week was full of prayer vigils, memorial services, intentional conversations with mourning students, times of personal prayer, and heartache. Heaviness filled my heart. My heart was broken for the families who lost children. My heart was burdened for our church staff as they ministered to our community. My heart was torn for the young man that remained alive who drove the car and had lost brothers & a friend.

In the midst of this God brought me to Job chapter 1. Here was Job, in chapter 1 he lost everything. His servants, his livestock, and his children had all just died. In a short moment, so much was lost. I read this chapter and as I read the last three verses I stopped with awe. After all of this, how did Job respond?

"Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head, and he fell to the ground and worshiped. He said, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, And naked I shall return there. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD." Through all this Job did not sin nor did he blame God." Job 1:20-22

I looked at these verses and could not believe Job's response. Job fell down and worshiped God. That was His first response. He recognized that God is the one who gives all good things and in His sovereignty He can take them away. Job blessed God.

So what can we learn from Job in the midst of tragedy? I must confess I felt ill prepared when tragedy struck our community. I have learned many lessons this week, but mostly that in the midst of tragedy I must seek God, I must walk in faith, and I must walk in an attitude of worship. When tragedy strikes we cannot seek to put the blame or be angry at God. We in turn must trust and worship Him.

Fighting for the Unity

Sixth grade was the worst year of my life. Well, at least is seemed that way at the time. I had just moved up from elementary school leaving my best friend behind. Elizabeth was a year younger than me and it was like torture to not have her in Sixth grade with me. I had two girls that I was friends with. One day they made fun of something I wore. I was so embarrassed that I yelled at them. I can't remember what I said, but my words created a storm. My two friends became my enemies and they seemingly lived to make my year as miserable as possible. 

Words of Fire
My words started a storm that felt unfixable. James 3:5 says "So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire!" James lays it out there for us, the tongue, even though it is so small, is strong enough to set an entire forrest on fire. The tongue is powerful!

James goes on to talk more about the tongue" With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way. Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water?"

James makes it quite clear to us. As believers our mouths should not bless and curse men. That word curse in the greek means "to pray against, to wish evil against a person or thing" Any time we wish evil or speak evil against someone we are cursing them with our mouths. James tells us that a fountain cannot send forth both fresh and bitter water from the same opening. As believers we should be a fresh water fountain. Bitter water should never come out of us, in the same way our words should never be filled with a curse. 

The fiery words I spoke  in the Sixth grade happened in a moment. My friendship with those girls was never the same. My heart breaks when I hear about similar situations happening in the body of Christ. 

Unity in the Body
When speaking of the body of Christ Paul often reminds of for the need of unity, giving each other grace, speaking in love, and walking in forgiveness toward each other. In Ephesians 4:3, Paul urges us to be "diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." In Colossians 3:12-14 Paul writes "So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity." When speaking of the body Paul often reminds believers that there is one body. In 1 Corinthians 12, Paul uses the word one or same 17 times. Over and over he reminds us that the body is to be one. Whether we are Jews, Greeks, slaves, or free, all believers are made into one body. Paul is crystal clear that as believers we should not only be concerned about unity in the body, we should fight for it.

The Fight for Unity
How do we fight for unity? It starts with our tongue. Often dissension in the body of Christ happens when we open our mouths and speak. It happens when we gossip about other believers. It happens when we argue and fight. Paul is clear about how our response should be, let's go back to Colossians 3. We are to "put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, & patience; bearing with one allotter, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone."So when we are faced with a situation where we want to speak in a manner that is not worthy, then we do what is often hard to do, we speak in a manner worthy of Jesus. Colossians tells us that just as Jesus forgave us, so we too ought to forgive others. So when we walk in the things that are hard, we are walking like Jesus, we are forgiving like Jesus.

But I Can't Do it!!!
You might be like me and thinking, I don't have the strength to do that. Or, you don't know what they did to me. I may not know what happened, but I can tell you that God's Word is still clear on the answer. Colossians 3:12-14, is not an option. It's not even something we are to strive for. As believers Colossians 3:12-14 is our identity. We are to wear it like clothing. So how do we we walk in this? How do we embrace this as our identity? By embracing Jesus. When we abide in Jesus like we see in John 15, then we are given the strength to walk in the way Paul describes in Colossians 3.

So where are you at? What kind of words come out of your mouth? Are they words that curse or words that bless? Are you hurting the body of Christ by speaking words that divide? Or are you fighting for the unity?

Words of Grace

"Can I be brutally honest with you?" is a phrase I used to use quite frequently.  When my friends would come to me for advice I would ask them my question and then I would be brutally honest. I cannot tell you how many conversations I walked away from where I knew I had hurt that person's feelings. Unfortunately I walked away thinking, well I warned them, I asked if I could be honest, if they didn't want that they shouldn't have said I could be honest.

I strongly remember doing this with one of my college roommates. The shock and hurt on her face still hurts my heart. I do not remember the conversation, just the stunned and hurt look she wore. I knew in that moment I had messed up, but I was so wrapped up in the freedom of my words that I refused to even apologize. I was living by "if you love them speak the truth" instead of "speak the truth in love." I was living in a twisted version of Truth. Yes, I was living in a self righteous lie about my words. And the Lord would only let me live there for so long.

Over time, the Lord got in my face with His Word and started showing me what He thought about my words. As I looked at scripture I could not get away from what God has to say: that words are a fire and a restless evil. God revealed to me that my words could bless or my words could curse, but they could not do both. James 3:11 tells us: Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water?" I realized that there was something wrong with my words. I couldn't call myself a believer and not consider the words I spoke to people. If I was in Jesus, then I should be a fountain with fresh water, and a fresh water fountain cannot send forth bitter water. My "truthful" words were actually bitter words. God was opening my eyes to a change needed in my life.

God used a mentor to continue to affirm this Truth. She was my assigned mentor for a summer. I had known her for many years. I was honestly surprised when I spent time with her. She was not the woman I remembered.  She had transformed from a loud and blunt person to someone who walked with grace. I asked her what was different, what had happened to the woman I once knew? As she told her story it reminded me so much of myself. She shared how God transformed her especially when it came to her words and shared Colossians 4:6 with me: Let your speech always be with grace, as though seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person. 

As I considered this verse I realized I had zero grace in my words. I knew that I did not have an ounce of grace in me naturally. But I was living in a lie of "Well this is how God made me!" God showed me that just because I do not come by words of grace naturally, He still calls me to walk in them. That was a hard realization, because I liked the freedom I had, and I did not want to acknowledge I was abusing my freedom. Slowly, God began to change my words. Over time, He taught me how to walk in His Truths regarding my words. Sometimes I still struggle, but God is reminding me of the importance of the way I speak. And that to walk worthy of Him is to talk in a manner worthy which always involves grace. 

We just cannot get away from God's grace. God has given us this amazing grace: His Son who died on our behalf so that while we were yet in sin, we might have eternal life. God allows His grace to show up in our lives in so many ways. I am so grateful for His grace in my life. I know without a doubt I do not deserve it. I know in turn I am called to walk in the grace He so freely bestowed on me. He calls us to walk in grace with ourselves and with others. He calls our speech to be seasoned with grace. May my words be worthy of Him.

Ambassadors of Grace

Welcome to part three of my series on grace. Today we are going to talk about being Ambassadors of Grace.

I often find myself in need of grace. I look at myself and realize that I fail. I fail at life pretty much every moment of every day. And in that I know that I need grace. I need God’s saving grace in my life to mold me and change me into the new creature He says that I am. I am unable to do it on my own. I need Him to do it.

However, I am not very quick to give grace. When it comes to others, I am quick to criticize and judge. I am quick to think negatively of others.

Gratefully the Lord has placed some special people in my life that have taught me about living as an ambassador of grace. First is my best friend Elizabeth. The Lord gave her to me as a lifelong friend at the age of 4 (she was three). Elizabeth embodies grace and mercy. She will forgive anyone no matter how many times they have hurt her. As her friend it has often made me defensive of her. 

Then there is my husband. He often views people with a lens of grace. He has the ability to give people a second chance when I am ready to write them off forever. And I have learned, that often he is right. I have learned to listen to his wisdom and perception of others.

The Lord has used these two people to teach me a very hard lesson (that I am still learning mind you). That lesson is how to walk as an ambassador of grace. I once heard someone describe it as being a grace dispenser. As someone who has received grace for the Father, I should in turn dispense grace to others (especially those who are my brothers and sister in Christ). You see, I don’t come by grace naturally. It is something the Lord has needed to grow in me.

So how do we become ambassadors of grace?

We seek God and walk in His Spirit. True grace can only be found in God. To walk in grace, I must be walking in God. I must be abiding in Him as I see taught in John 15.  Often those times I don’t want to even consider giving someone a second chance, I am living in my flesh. The flesh is what Paul calls the “old man” or the “old self”. To give grace to others, I need to be in the Spirit (as in the Holy Spirit). I can only do this when I am abiding in Jesus.

We realize that nice and grace are not the same. For some reason many of us have equated “being nice” with grace. I am sorry, but these are just not the same thing. Often being an ambassador of grace means doing the hard thing. Sometimes it involves speaking the truth in love. Walking in grace is not always warm and fuzzy and rarely involves roses and bunnies. Sometimes it hurts.

We move beyond ourselves. Phil 2:3 tells us that we should regard one another as more important than ourselves. As we seek to be ambassadors of grace we must consider others before ourselves.

We speak the Gospel. The Gospel itself is grace. We cannot be ambassadors of grace without speaking the Gospel to those around us. 

Being an ambassador of grace is not an option. If you are a believer, then showing grace to others is apart of your identity. It is something that was first given to us and that we should in turn extend to those around us. I encourage you to consider those around you and ask whether or not you are dispensing the grace that was first given to you. 

Walking In Grace: Me, Myself, and I

Last week, we defined grace. This week I want to talk about living out grace with myself.

That may seem odd to you, but the Lord has put several women in my path recently that struggle to show grace to themselves. And I will be honest, I struggle with it too. My name is Ashlee, and I am a perfectionist. This means I have very high standards, this means I am very hard on myself. Even today as an adult verbal discipline is the hardest for me to receive. It crushes my heart for someone to tell me they are disappointed in me. And then I beat myself up about it.

 As I look at the young women God has placed in my life, I see they struggle with the same thing. I do not think this is something women struggle with alone, but it is definitely something the women God has placed around me struggle with. So how do we learn to walk in grace with ourselves?

Walking in Grace with Myself is NOT:

A free ride to live however I want. I see this often with believers my age, they think that because of God's grace they get a free pass to live whatever life they want. I have some bad news for them, this is not what the Word of God tells us. God is very clear in His standard for our lives. His standard is holiness. Peter reminds us of this in 1 Peter 1:15-16 “But like the Hole One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written, “YOU SHALL BE HOLY FOR I AM HOLY”” Walking in grace here looks like me walking in obedience to who God has called me to be, while realizing I can only be that because of what He has already done for me. There is a dependence that I need here on God. Only by abiding in Him, do I have the ability to be who He calls me to be.

Seeking the approval of man over God. Yep, I am one of those people pleasers. I was a suck up in high school. I was that girl who did extra credit when she had a 4.0 GPA. Sick, I know. I continue to struggle with pleasing others, but this year God is reminding me heavily of Galatians 1:10 “For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still striving to please men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ.”  When God first brought this verse to my attention it grabbed me. It shook me. It reminded me that I am to strive to please God, because I am His bondservant. It also contrasted the stark reality in my life that I often care too much of what others say of me and too little about who God has already said that I am in Him. To walk in grace with myself, means I seek the approval of God alone.

Self Abasement. My Bible Study girls and I are studying Colossians. And it is AWESOME. As we have studied, this word self-abasement (Col 2:18) stuck out to me. When I looked it up in the Greek, I was surprised. Self-abasement is a lowliness of mind, specifically in Colossians it refers to a false humility. When I understood what this meant, a light came on for me. I have several people in my life who belittle themselves. Now, God calls us to be humble, but this belittling is not a Christ-like humility.  It is a belittling that sees one's self as less than and loses sight of Jesus' death on the cross. For me to walk in grace with myself has nothing to do with a false sense of humility, but has everything to do with trusting Who God says I am in Him (See Col 2 & Eph 2 for more on this). It means I do not walk around beating myself up or punishing myself. It means I submit myself as a bondservant of the Lord, not myself.

 

Learning to walk in grace with myself, is something I continue to struggle with. But when I do I must change my perspective by remembering what I see in Scripture. This is the only way that our view of ourself changes. I must view myself on God's terms. For me it's important to remember what Paul says in 1 Corinthians 15:10, by God's grace I am what I am. Everytime we struggle, we must return to the Word and see the Truth again. To help us cling to this verse today. I made this for you!

 

 

Grace Defined

This is Part One of a Four Part Series on Grace. This week we will define Grace.

Grace is an awesome thing. Grace is a confusing thing. God’s grace often doesn’t make any sense to any of us.

Vine’s Dictionary tells us this about grace:

on the part of the bestower, the friendly disposition from which the kindly act proceeds, graciousness, loving-kindness, goodwill generally, especially with reference to the Divine favor or "grace," in this respect there is stress on its freeness and universality, its spontaneous character, as in the case of God's redemptive mercy, and the pleasure or joy He designs for the recipient; thus it is set in contrast with debt, with works, and with law.

on the part of the receiver, a sense of the favor bestowed, a feeling of gratitude, ("thanks"); in this respect it sometimes signifies "to be thankful,"

I have often heard of grace defined as unmerited favor. To truly define grace, we must turn to Scripture and let God tell us about His grace. Exodus 34:6 is an important place we see grace defined. Here, God is meeting with Moses and giving the Ten Commandments (the second time around after Moses shattered the first set). God comes before Moses and tells Moses about Himself:

Then the LORD passed by in front of him and proclaimed, "The LORD, the LORD God, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in lovingkindness and truth; who keeps lovingkindness for thousands, who forgives iniquity, transgression and sin; yet He will by no means leave the guilty unpunished, visiting the iniquity of fathers on the children and on the grandchildren to the third and fourth generations." Moses made haste to bow low toward the earth and worship.

Did you notice what God said about Himself? He is compassionate & gracious. He is slow to anger. Did you notice Moses’ response? He made haste to bow low. God defines grace in Himself. It is His character. When we look at God’s Word we see grace in God’s character: Noah & the Ark, Saving Lot out of Sodom, giving Moses the 10 Commandments, choosing Israel as His chosen people, the giving of the Temple as a place of worshiping God & offering sacrifice, the giving of the land of Canaan, God as a warrior going before His people in battle, etc. Over and over again, we see God, who is grace.

In John 1:17, we see something else: For the Law was given through Moses; grace and truth were realized through Jesus Christ. In John, we see grace was realized through Jesus.

Paul talks about grace through Jesus further in Romans 5. In this chapter, Paul defines grace. He tells us how grace came about and what it is. He says that while we were helpless, Christ died for us, He justified us by His blood, He reconciled us to God through His death, and He gave us life. Grace is what Christ did for me on the cross. Grace in Jesus is that while I was yet dead in my sin, Christ made me alive with Him. Grace in Jesus is that while I earned eternal death because of my sin, Christ gave me eternal life in Him.

How can we know what grace is? Grace, can only be defined in God and through Jesus. To know grace, we must know Him.

Grace defined…this is just the beginning. Join me next week as I talk about walking in grace.

Feed Yourself

I love food and I love to cook. I am not one of those girls who doesn't eat. In fact I get cranky if I don't eat regularly. And trust me, you don't want it to get to that point. I am positive that I am not alone in this. 

However, when it comes to the Word of God most of us are anorexic. Most of us do not even realize how little we spend in the Word. As believers it is crucial that we feed ourselves spiritually. The only food that satisfies is the living and active Word of God.

So, why should we care? Why does it matter if we are feeding ourselves spiritually?

It Matters in the Day to Day

Whether or not I am in the Word affects me each day. Getting into the Word each morning sets my mind on spiritual things. It prepares my mind for the day. It directs my heart toward the Lord. The days I don't start in the Word are different and not for the better. I have learned over time that being in the Word daily is crucial. 

Fill Up to Pour Out

As a spiritual leader, how can I expect to take someone anywhere I have not been myself. As a leader I want to take people to the Word. But if I am not in the Word myself, I have nothing to offer those I lead. I need to be intentional to fill up on the Word so I can pour it out to others. As a leader it is easy for be to be drained and daily time in the Word encourages me and revives me so I can continue to lead those around me. Psalms 119:107 encourages us toward this, it says "I am exceedingly afflicted; Revive me, O LORD, according to Your word." 

Reading vs. Studying

Please note that there is a difference between just reading and studying the Word of God. Reading can be done by anyone. Reading is often mindless and short. Studying takes time. It involves digging into the Word. When I just read something I can easily walk away without really learning anything. Studying allows God's Word to be written on my heart. 2 Tim 2:15 calls us to "Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth." I encourage you to consider whether or not you are a workman who does not need to be ashamed. Are you accurately handling the Word of God?

Duty vs. Delight

I ask you to consider your time in the Word. Why do you do it? Are you spending time in the Word because you know you should (or someone told you to), or because you have a desire for it? When I first started studying it was more out of duty. I knew that was something that Christians were supposed to do, so I did my best to try. I was looking more to check something off my "Being a Good Christian List" than I was concerned about truly knowing Jesus and spending time at His feet.  Psalms 119:16 calls us to something greater than our "Good Christian" list. It says "I shall delight in Your statutes; I shall not forget Your word." So consider, do you see the Word as a duty or a delight?

It Guides Us

The Bible is a crucial guide in our life. Psalm 119:105 tells us "Your word is a lamp to my feet And a light to my path." The Bible guides and shapes it. God uses it to transform us from the inside out. Studying the Bible is how baby believers become mature Christians. I often tell my girls that you don't become a mature believer through osmosis, you have to actually spend time in the Word to know it and for it to transform you. Have you considered if you are allowing God's Word to guide you?

It Brings Sanctification
The Bible is the only thing that can bring about our sanctification. When Jesus prays in John 17:17 He says "Sanctify them in truth, Your word is truth." Sanctification is to be set apart or made holy. Holiness is something God calls every believer to holiness (1 Peter 1:15-16). Holiness can only be achieved through the Word of God. It is not something I do myself, but something God does through me in His Word. 

I ask you to look at your daily walk. I ask you to consider the importance of personal Bible Study in your life. I pray that you will see that the Word is as crucial in your life as food is to your body and in turn you will seek to feed yourself!!

To read more posts I have written on Bible Study follow the links below:

Do you Really Know Him?

Resolve to Be Accountable

Never Be the Same

Spa Night Printables

I mentioned on Monday that I used scripture around our host home during Spa Night. Today I would like to share some of this signs I created for each station. At most stations there were two signs. One gave directions, the other was scripture that pointed them to think beyond the physical action at that station.

You will notice I used the same style throughout each sign. I printed the scriptures as 8.5X11 and the instructions as 4x6 and 5x7. Next time I would do all of the direction signs as 5x7 so they are easier to read.

Invitation:

This is the invitation I created for my girls. I used this on the Facebook invite I created. It also dawned on me that in the future I could simply text the girls the invitation.

Welcome Sign:
I created this sign to greet the girls when they arrived.

Pedicures:
For Pedicures I created this sign to give instructions to the girls because I could not be everywhere at the same time. I put this sign on the fireplace in the living room. Next to it I sat a basket full of foot scrubs, lotions, foot fizzies, and various foot scrubbing tools.

 I chose this scripture to remind the girls that the most important place their feet go is where they take the gospel. I don’t necessarily mean a foreign country or a mission trip. The gospel goes with us everywhere we go. And we are either living it out or we are denying it with our words and actions. I pray that my girls will know that beautiful feet are those who take the gospel with them as they are going. Beautiful feet speak faith, hope, love, and truth into the places they go everyday and the not so normal places they might go on a mission trip. Painted nails may seemingly make our feet look good, but beautiful feet are those who take the gospel with them.

Manicures:
Here is another directional sign I created. This time for manicures. I sat this sign on the table in between the nail polish platter and the Satin Hands Set.

I chose this scripture so my girls would consider whether or not their hands were really clean. As they scrubbed their hands and painted their nails I wanted them to remember that the Lord is serious about those who enter into His presence and that we need to constantly check our hearts and our hands to see if they are clean spiritually.

Facials:
Then we had facials. I sat the directional sign next to the sink. Next to the sign was a basket with the facial supplies in it.

I pray that when my girls saw this scripture they would be reminded to seek God’s face. Often as ladies we spend much time in front of the mirror considering how we look, but I wonder how often as believers we seek God and His face as we go about our everyday life.

 

I posted this on Monday, but wanted you to see it again. This was the main verse I spoke on when I gathered the girls at the end of the night. I pray that it is a blessing to you and reminds you that your beauty lies within a heart submitted to the Lord.

Disclaimer: These printables were created by me. The blue linen background is free to download here. Please do not republish my work without giving me credit. I encourage you to use them personally, but they should not be sold for any reason.