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Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Something New

Do you ever sense God is about to do something really big? That is how I have been feeling the last few months. Slowly God has been calling to me and speaking to me. Calling me out of myself and into something I never could have planned.

It started around Christmas. If you don't know, in November my Love became the college minister at our church. During Christmas, I could sense the Lord speaking to me. He was showing me that He wanted me to start leading the college girls He has given us in this new ministry He had given us. I immediately walked away and said, "No Lord, not me". "Don't you know, I'm not the life of the party, I feel awkward in social situations, I like my alone time". But over and over the Lord would not let it go. In fact, He showed me some potential leaders that might fill that spot if I did not step up and obey where He was calling me. And I didn't like what I was seeing.

I was afraid to tell anyone, you see they might hold me accountable if I shared it with them. But the Lord would not stop. He would not let me out of what He was calling me to. It almost became comedic.  So I approached my husband about starting a weekly Bible study in our apartment for the college girls. He was so excited and encouraged me to follow where the Lord was leading. So I stepped out in faith and started a Bible study. And people actually came. You see, I'm married to the outgoing fun one, I'm more the laid back quiet one. But when I kick him out once a week and my apartment is full of girls I am the only one here to lead them.  During this time the Lord has revealed some ways I have hidden behind my husband. And He has shown me I am not walking in who He has created me to be even if it doesn't feel natural. He has stretched me each week. He has blessed me with a group of ladies who hunger for the Word, they are diligent to study the Word. It has been incredible. The Lord has totally blown me away through them. I am blessed to lead them.

During this time of study, the Lord began to call out again. And say, "Ashlee, that's not enough. I'm not done with you yet". And as I sought Him, He began to allow me to be apart of conversations where the girls clearly showed me a need they had. I realized, they just wanted to be girls. They want community together. They wanted friendship and accountability. And so, I began to brainstorm. I began to seek out ideas of girls events I could start hosting. And as I began sharing my ideas with the girls, they got so excited.

Often I think we walk into ministry expecting to bless people, but I can honestly say these girls have blessed me way more than I could have ever imagined. It has been awhile since I have seen God so clearly at work in the details of something. Even today and I have been working to finalize the details of our first event next weekend, God has come through in ways that just floor me. God continues to blow me away every corner I turn.

God is totally doing something new in my life. He is calling me to a new ministry. It is very bittersweet. I have spent the last 11 years ministering to junior high and high school girls in various capacities. I never thought I wold do anything different. In fact I could not even imagine it. In June, I will fully move over into college ministry. I will continue the work that has only begun with our college girls. And I am so excited. I'm excited to see God at work in this ministry. I am excited to see the new and exciting things He calls me to. I am confident He has prepared me for this ministry. I am blessed when I consider the ways He has endeared these girls to my heart. There are moments I get scared, but then I remember the clear calling of the Lord and have perfect peace. I ask that you pray for me in this new ministry. Pray for these girls the Lord has given me. I have no idea what I am doing other than following the leadership of the Lord. I can hardly wait for what is to come. This not the end, but the beginning of something new.

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